From: Judy
Hello, Jessica! I have a bit of progress report, with many thanks to you, as well as a few questions.
I wrote you earlier this year -- the "Learning the Hard Way" message -- in a confused state about how to "fix" my premature horse-buying mistakes and how to move ahead. I've been very lucky to have some options open up to me. I've found a good stable where I can keep Precious (5-year-old App. mare) on full turn-out for half the money I was paying for board at my "friend's" barn. That frees up enough money for me to take a weekly lesson at the same stable.
I'm still feeling my way around about exactly what I want to *do* as a rider. I'm beginning with basic dressage lessons, as I figure that will be an excellent foundation for a number of things -- continued dressage, jumping (which Precious seems to be interested in, judging from her interest in the jumps and her willingness to walk and trot over poles and very low jumps), or just fun trail riding. Not to mention simply having a horse/horses in my life. My instructor is pretty good for now -- a wonderful attitude about horses and care for the animal, though the lessons are not quite as organized and goal-oriented as I would like. We're working on that.
I also want more help from someone on ground work (longeing, etc.) and I'm not sure she's the right instructor for that (it's not worked well for me the couple times we've tried). I've heard about (and met briefly) another instructor in the area I'd like to approach for longeing lessons. I'm just not sure how to negotiate (avoid) any conflicts. I guess just being open and clear about what I want from each instructor....?
Also, after a couple lessons on a school horse, my instructor thinks I'm advanced enough that I should ride my own horse Precious for my lessons, rather than one of her school horses. I'm okay with that for the most part (except I know I'm not "advanced" at all!) because *I want to ride my horse*. And, part of me says, why not ride her during the lessons and learn how to train her as well. Another part of me is concerned that this is not the wisest way to go about it. Input?
I'm delighted to hear that everything is going well for you and your horse; I had wondered how things were going for you! The stable sounds very nice, and basic dressage lessons will see you through your jumping -- it's just dressage over fences, after all -- and through any amount of trailriding! I've always said that dressage SHOULD create the ultimate trail horse -- you're going to have a LOT of fun. :-)
If you have access to a good instructor with a longe horse, by all means try to get some lessons. It's a wonderful experience, and nothing can duplicate it. But I suggest that you go and WATCH a lesson or two first, to find out whether this instructor is someone you will enjoy learning from, and to see whether you like the way she teaches on the longe.
If you like everything you see, sign up for some lessons. But by all means, be absolutely honest with BOTH instructors. Don't put either of them in an awkward position -- one feeling that someone else is "stealing" her student, and one feeling that she may be "poaching" someone else's student. I can tell you that it's a bad feeling, no matter which side you're on! You may be pleasantly surprised when you talk to them, anyway -- if your instructor is good, and it sounds as if she is, she will be happy to know that you have found someone to give you longe lessons, and she won't feel threatened by the other instructor because you are still taking lessons with her, and you didn't go behind her back to get your new lessons. Honesty really IS the best policy!
As for riding your own horse during lessons, try it for a while and see how it goes. You can always ask to be put back onto a school horse later. In an ideal situation, someone experienced and kind would work with Precious while you took lessons on a good schoolmaster horse, and then the two of you would be put back together as a team when you had each achieved a certain level of competence. But in the real world, that ideal situation hardly ever exists! I know that I spend a lot of teaching time training the horse THROUGH the rider, while teaching the rider to ride and train simultaneously... it takes longer, but it can work if you have the right horse and rider and instructor combination. As long as you feel that you are learning, that Precious is learning, and that you are learning how to teach your horse, this situation should work for you. You've certainly got the right attitude! ;-) Students like you are a real joy to teach; your instructor is lucky, and you can tell her I said so.
- Jessica
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